Category Archives: Funny

Top Ten Ways of Avoiding Being Social (That’s Not Reading)

10. Taking a long bath with calming music.

9. Binge-watch Gilmore Girls for the 29348202 time.

8. Come up with an elaborate prank ala Jim Halpert.

7. Convene with nature

6. Rearrange your home library

5. Take a nap

4. Cook a gourmet meal

3. Shop Online

2. Rearrange furniture and realize it was perfect the way it was.

  1. Contemplate your life choices

How Not to Get Out of Doing Dishes

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I’m currently attempting to type with nine good fingers and a pinky that is incapacitated.

Last night (well at the time of writing this) I decided it was a good time to get the dishes washed. Hubby was willing to dry, turned on some punk music via Tom Morello’s radio show on Lithium on Sirius and jammed out. For about 15 minutes.

I reached into the sink to pick out a dish and my pinky finger grazed a mixing bowl that was chipped. There was that slip second of thinking everything was fine but it didn’t take long to realize that it wasn’t a tiny little cut and in fact, there was now a good size gap in my finger that was bleeding like crazy.

I informed my husband as calmly as I could that was was going to pass out, throw up or both and then proceeded to slum onto the kitchen floor. When I came too I threw up. Hubby then cleaned up my finger and after some debating I decided to forgo the ER and limped up to bed.

Then this morning before work I had hubby help me change the bandage. And it was not the kind of thing I wanted to see and thus, passed out again. This time my husband called my doctor and got me an appointment. Called me out of work and then helped me lay down on the couch until my appointment.

I’m home out of work for two weeks now, I have an antibiotic for a week and an appointment to get my dressing changed tomorrow morning.

At least now I have an excuse not to wash dishes for awhile.